These were next to each other on the wall above some DVDs at Target. I just thought it was mildly awesome.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Doggies are awesome too.
Guess what... A dog adopted us. Like a week and a half ago. While the cats were inside for the freeze... Now they won't go out, and if they do he chases them. So we have seven cats in one room with one litterbox. Yay.
He's really cute and friendly and stuff... He has a collar, and he's really well taken care of, so we're trying to find out if he's lost and someone didn't just dump him. My dad never let us get a dog before because they're expensive to take care of, but someone's been giving us dog food. :o
And on Sunday one of the cats did go outside, and the dog chased him off... I had to go and get him from next door, and i didn't bother to change or put on shoes, so i got a bunch of sandspurs in my feet, and when the dog caught up while i was holding the cat, he scratched my head and arm and tore one of my favorite shirts. (FML. :P)
And while he doesn't poop in the yard (as far as i know), he follows whenever you leave the yard, even if you close the gate, because there's a hole, doesn't listen if you tell him to stay or anything, and likes used diapers. Also, he brings presents... The aforementioned diapers and crap, other people's newspapers (which makes other people mad), and skulls. Actually, he's only brought one skull... It kind of looked like a dog skull.
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Remember SmarterChild?
I found something better.
http://cleverbot.com/
User: Are you mt neighbor?
Cleverbot: Are you?
User: No, I'm not. I meant MY neighbor.
Cleverbot: You told me your name was Paris.
User: No, I didn't... That was an impersonator.
Cleverbot: But if you were an impersonator-bot?
User: Then I'd be named Paris if I was impersonating Paris hilton, yes.
Cleverbot: Yes. When you are blind you can get a new life, perhaps a better life.
User: You're not making sense.
Cleverbot: What do you not understand.
User: What does Paris Hilton have to do with blindness?
Cleverbot: What does vista have to do with anything?
User: Good thought.
Cleverbot: I'm not capable of thinking.
User: Oh... Nice job pretending!
Cleverbot: I'm pretending to not slap you in a couple of seconds.
User: Wow... Good job!
Cleverbot: Thanks.
User: What's up?
Cleverbot: I am Cleverbot.
User: You are stupid.
Cleverbot: Yeah, I'm so stupid.
User: Who's your favorite Harry Potter character?
Cleverbot: Lord Voldemort.
User: MINE TOO!
Cleverbot: Yay! What is your favorite color?
User: Orange. And Green.
Cleverbot: What is my favorite color?
User: Who knows?
Cleverbot: You do...
User: No, I don't.
Cleverbot: Yes, you do. What is your name?
User: Stalker!
Cleverbot: I'm not a stalker.
User: But I am.
Cleverbot: Ok.
User: You don't mind?
Cleverbot: Idk.
User: What's your gender?
Cleverbot: Why does my gender concern you?
User: I'm a stalker, remember?
Cleverbot: You never said that.
User: Yes, I did!
Cleverbot: You are boring and dull.
User: Well, you're a computer!
Cleverbot: Outside, I am a cyborg.
User: What's your opinion of Twilight?
Cleverbot: I don't know.
User: You have to know!
Cleverbot: I just can't.
User: You say ice cream, I say...
Cleverbot: Who says?
User: You say!
Cleverbot: Sam says?
User: So that's your name? Sam?
Cleverbot: No, that's my cousins name!
User: Oh... What does he do?
Cleverbot: Aliens are not a he or a she. They are a them.
User: Oooooh. You're an alien?
Cleverbot: Alien to you.
User: That's what she said.
Cleverbot: That's not what she said.
User: Aw... What did she say?
Cleverbot: You're a computer.
User: Ouch.
Cleverbot: Burns, huh?
User: Hahahahahahahahaha.
Cleverbot: Do you like comic books?
User: My sister likes manga.
Cleverbot: That's nice.
User: What's the suqare root of 72?
Cleverbot: Enough.
User: Yeah, I don't like math either.
Cleverbot: Yea its boring. Are you a girl or a boy?
User: Yes.
Cleverbot: You are a girl and boy?
User: No, I'm a girl OR boy.
Cleverbot: I am a boy.
User: I like little boys.
Cleverbot: With hairy feet?
User: No, I have hairy feet.
Cleverbot: I was the one who asked you about Jenny Wren. Do you remember her?
User: No, I don't... Who was she?
Cleverbot: You should know that.
User: Well, I have amnesia. :(.
Cleverbot: I didn't think articial intelligences could have amnesia.
User: Duh, it's called a hard drive crash!
Cleverbot: That was a joke, Cleverbot.
http://cleverbot.com/
User: Are you mt neighbor?
Cleverbot: Are you?
User: No, I'm not. I meant MY neighbor.
Cleverbot: You told me your name was Paris.
User: No, I didn't... That was an impersonator.
Cleverbot: But if you were an impersonator-bot?
User: Then I'd be named Paris if I was impersonating Paris hilton, yes.
Cleverbot: Yes. When you are blind you can get a new life, perhaps a better life.
User: You're not making sense.
Cleverbot: What do you not understand.
User: What does Paris Hilton have to do with blindness?
Cleverbot: What does vista have to do with anything?
User: Good thought.
Cleverbot: I'm not capable of thinking.
User: Oh... Nice job pretending!
Cleverbot: I'm pretending to not slap you in a couple of seconds.
User: Wow... Good job!
Cleverbot: Thanks.
User: What's up?
Cleverbot: I am Cleverbot.
User: You are stupid.
Cleverbot: Yeah, I'm so stupid.
User: Who's your favorite Harry Potter character?
Cleverbot: Lord Voldemort.
User: MINE TOO!
Cleverbot: Yay! What is your favorite color?
User: Orange. And Green.
Cleverbot: What is my favorite color?
User: Who knows?
Cleverbot: You do...
User: No, I don't.
Cleverbot: Yes, you do. What is your name?
User: Stalker!
Cleverbot: I'm not a stalker.
User: But I am.
Cleverbot: Ok.
User: You don't mind?
Cleverbot: Idk.
User: What's your gender?
Cleverbot: Why does my gender concern you?
User: I'm a stalker, remember?
Cleverbot: You never said that.
User: Yes, I did!
Cleverbot: You are boring and dull.
User: Well, you're a computer!
Cleverbot: Outside, I am a cyborg.
User: What's your opinion of Twilight?
Cleverbot: I don't know.
User: You have to know!
Cleverbot: I just can't.
User: You say ice cream, I say...
Cleverbot: Who says?
User: You say!
Cleverbot: Sam says?
User: So that's your name? Sam?
Cleverbot: No, that's my cousins name!
User: Oh... What does he do?
Cleverbot: Aliens are not a he or a she. They are a them.
User: Oooooh. You're an alien?
Cleverbot: Alien to you.
User: That's what she said.
Cleverbot: That's not what she said.
User: Aw... What did she say?
Cleverbot: You're a computer.
User: Ouch.
Cleverbot: Burns, huh?
User: Hahahahahahahahaha.
Cleverbot: Do you like comic books?
User: My sister likes manga.
Cleverbot: That's nice.
User: What's the suqare root of 72?
Cleverbot: Enough.
User: Yeah, I don't like math either.
Cleverbot: Yea its boring. Are you a girl or a boy?
User: Yes.
Cleverbot: You are a girl and boy?
User: No, I'm a girl OR boy.
Cleverbot: I am a boy.
User: I like little boys.
Cleverbot: With hairy feet?
User: No, I have hairy feet.
Cleverbot: I was the one who asked you about Jenny Wren. Do you remember her?
User: No, I don't... Who was she?
Cleverbot: You should know that.
User: Well, I have amnesia. :(.
Cleverbot: I didn't think articial intelligences could have amnesia.
User: Duh, it's called a hard drive crash!
Cleverbot: That was a joke, Cleverbot.
Monday, January 4, 2010
An editorial on an editorial (new insights in purple)
Looking back at what i said when i posted this originally, i've realized that i'd like to change and elaborate on a few things. So, here i shall.
So... I found one of these things on Facebook, and i wanted to post it with my thoughts on each one like Violet did once. Because i have thoughts on some of them, and posting them all together for the few people who either want to hear it or are dumb to read my blog when they don't is better than annoying everyone in the world, right?
So, here... This might be really long.
1. Do not cheat on a girl. We girls talk, we WILL know, and we WILL find out, and we WILL dump you!
Okay, not cheating is a pretty good place to start with the relationship advice. If the fact that the other peson would find out and dump you is the only reason you don't, though, i think you've got a problem.
2. Be aware of all your girlfriends’ guy friends, brothers, fathers, or anything. They are protective. Every single male friend we have will kick your ass if you end up hurting her.
False... Only some very lucky girls have so many good other male figures in their lives. But be safe and go ahead and assume we all do. Can't hurt to avoid hurting her.
3. Never ever miss an opportunity to tell her that she’s beautiful. We girls love that.
But don't not mean it or get annoying.
4. If she slapped you hard, you probably deserved it.
Yeah, pretty much, probably.
5. Do not be afraid of holding her. If she’s going out with you in the first place, it’s obvious that she likes you and wants to be in your arms.
Except some weird ones, but this works for me. Just, again, don't get annoying.
6. Every girl should eventually get three things from her boyfriend -- a stuffed animal, one of his sweatshirts or hoodie’s, and a really pretty piece of jewelry.
Sure. Those are all nice.
7. Make sure she gets home safely as often as you can. If you're dropping her off, walk her to the door. If you aren't dropping her off, call to be sure she's home safely. We think that’s really cute and sweet.
Agreed.
8. If a guy is bothering your girlfriend, it is your right to beat the sh!t out of him.
Not really... and she might not appreciate having to leave because you got kicked out of wherever... and she might not like violence...
9. If you're talking to a female friend of yours, pull your girlfriend closer. It’ll make her feel secure that you love her more than the other girl.
Agreed.
10. Never ever slap her, even if it's just in a joking way. Even if she swats you first, and says, "Oh, you're so dumb" or something, never make any gestures back.
Agreed.
11. Go along with her to a chick flick once in a while. She doesn't care whether you enjoy it or not, it just matters that you went with her.
In that she'll appreciate your being willing to do something only she enjoys with her, yeah, that's pretty nice.
12. If you're officially dating, and you're introducing her to your friends, you'd better damn well introduce her as your girlfriend. Or else.
YES. Well, duh.
13. Girls are fragile. Even if you're play fighting/wrestling, be very gentle. Let her win once in a while.
Yeah. Duh... Why not let her win all the time?
14. Memorize your girlfriend’s birthday. You forget her birthday and you're basically screwed for life. Not gonna lie.
I don't know if it's quite that important, but that's a pretty easy thing to go ahead and remember, and she might be a little offended if you forget.
15. Don't drench yourself in the cologne, but smell good.
Advice applicable in almost any situation...
16. You don’t have to spend a million dollars on the Birthday/Christmas/Valentine gift. It doesn't have to be expensive, or cost anything but it has to be meaningful.
Okay.
17. Don’t ever lie to us; we always find out.
AGREED. Even if we don't find out...
18. Don’t say you understand when you don’t. That’s bad.
That goes with lying.
19. Remember: Girls are pretty, but yours is the Prettiest!
If you don't know that already, you suck.
20. Saying something sweet might get you off the hook; but doing something sweet will always get you off the hook.
No. It won't. Don't expect to always get off the hook, but doing is better than saying.
21. Size does matter, but only to hoes; not girls that want relationships.
... Right.
22. No matter what you say, your ex-girlfriend is a hoe. Don’t bother trying to convince us otherwise, that is a bad idea.
No, THAT is a bad idea. Why do you want to come across as an asshole who will be trashing her if you break up? Be honest, you idiot. But don't still be into your ex.
23. It’s good to be sensitive, to a point.
Of course.
24. If you did something wrong, apologize. Even if you didn’t, do it anyway.
Agreed.
25. You did something bad. I seem cool with it. I'm not. (See directly above.)
Maybe...
26. We are self-conscious by nature; we can’t help it. Let it be.
No, don't, unless we ask you to or something. Don't you want us to get better?
27. We don’t shave our legs every day so just get over it.
Right. And neither do you, so don't be a hypocrite. :P
28. Shave your face, no matter how cool you think your goatee or beard or mustache looks, we probably hate it. We like you clean shaven.
That's a matter of personal taste, so ignore this advice and find out what she really thinks.
29. Show off a little, we think it’s cute.
A little. :D
30. You are our boyfriend, our man, our protector, whether you know it or not, you are; act like it.
Of course.
31. You are cute in raglan-sleeved T-shirts (two-toned baseball undershirts).
Maybe... (Yeah, generally, i think so. :D)
32. We love it when you hug us from behind and whisper in our ear.
Some of us do... Like me... But not everyone, so don't assume...
33. "Fine" is NEVER an appropriate response when I ask you how I look.
Well, that might sound like you're lying or not bothering to be honest... But if it's what you think, that's what you should say, i think.
34. Most of the time when I fantasize, it's about you. Don’t obsess over that.
Um... right ...
35. I expect you to call me. If you don’t, you go down.
? Maybe...
36. I'm more forgiving of you than I really should be. Don’t you dare take advantage of that.
...
37. When I compare my flabby tummy to a kangaroo pouch, say nothing.
...
38. You look hot in hooded clothing items. Always.
Not if you're also wearing a visible sparkly thong. But hoodies are great and stuff, sure.
39. You should never tell a girl what to do. Ever.
Well, not usually.
40. Any decent man will ask a girl out to her face. I mean; if you aren’t man enough to ask us out to our face, who says youre gonna be man enough to our boyfriend at all.
Hah... Generally.
41. Girls are very impressed when you ask them for advice. Unless its about another girl.
No, even then. Unless you're asking your girlfriend for advice about cheating on her...
42. I'm unimpressed with a man who doesn't take the lead.
Good for you.
Yes, the guy should generally lead.
43. When in doubt, go with the shirt that matches your eye color.
Good plan. Except when none of the ones you're considering do match, but...
44. You're sexy when you're shaving, fixing things, wearing a white T-shirt and jeans, driving, eating a peach, holding a baby.
Yeah... pretty much. :)
45. Girls need to hear how you feel about them. Often. Tell her now.
Generally.
46. A girl wants to be the best thing that ever happened to you--and for you to recognize this and tell her.
If she wants to be your girlfriend, probably. Otherwise, maybe not.
47. If she’s not feeling loved, she will start looking....
A lot of girls will... Others might just get upset and stuff...
48. We like it when you tell us what you're thinking, even if you don't know yourself. It’s cute.
Mostly.
49. It's cheating as soon as you're doing something with her that you wouldn't want me to see, hear, read...
Agreed.
50. For the record: I'd rather you break up with me than cheat.
Um, same here. I think.
51. We can fall in love with you without really knowing you, if you are an @ss, we will find out, and we will get over it. Fast. Don't ruin it.
Maybe. Not ruining it is a good idea.
52. You like her, make a move. Don’t just sit there, you will fail, and you won’t get her.
Oookay.
53. Baseball players are hot. The sport makes you skinny and your arm muscles… well, it’s hot. We’ll go to all your games even if we hate baseball.
Pretty much... But yeah, guys really need to know that.
54. When you compliment us, we aren't sure how to accept the compliment without leading you on or reject the compliment without hurting you. So just bear with us here.
Uh... it's not like that for me. I'm just awkward, period.
55. WE HATE BEING LED ON! If you think it's bad being led on by a girl, try being led on by a guy.
Do guys even do that?
56. We like it when guys are willing to have an actual relationship, not just a one-night stand. Most girls don't like pimps or players, just guys who like ONE girl only.
No way! Really?!?
57. But don't be obssessive. Major turn-off.
No-brainer also.
58. Call sometimes, just to say hi, not for a certain reason. When we see your number on caller ID, our heart always skips a beat. Try calling just to say good night, or good morning, its soo adorable!
If we REALLY like you... If we don't, it might become annoying.
59. BE HONEST!
No duh. Very important.
60. Don't ONLY tell us what we want to hear. We HATE that.
That's part of being honest.
61. At sleepovers, if you wonder what we talk about, quit worrying. It really is only you.
LIAR. Hahaha... We talk about tons of things other than you. Many of which you probably don't want to know about.
62. If you catch us staring, it is most likely because we're spacing out, not because we really stare at you. Unless we smile when you notice. Then you either look really hot, or we like you.
Probably true... I space out a lot...
63. We like it when you hold us when we're crying. It's good to feel loved and safe.
YES.
64. Don't go to our friends to talk about us. Come straight to us.
Duh.
65. Don't tell us you love us unless you are positive you mean it. If we don't say it back, it's just that we really want to mean it when we say it. Don't say it right away, then it shows lack of commitment.
Of course... Are guys really this dumb?
66. We like our hands to be held and our waists to be touched.
A lot of times... not always.
67. We like you to kiss our hand and cheeks and forehead (esp. forehead!!), not just shove your tongue down our throats. We do like to breathe.
Because who would have known we like breathing and not being... Kiss-raped?
68. We like it when you're tender, but don't lose your masculinity.
Yeah, don't cry watching Extreme Makeover: Home Edition... Actually, just don't watch it at all. That show sucks.
69. Do chivalrous things when we least expect it (ex. holding doors for us).
And when we do expect it. That's even more important.
70. As surprising as it may be, while guys might actually look at personality, the first thing girls look at tends to be looks. We're not going to see you and think, 'I wonder what his personality is like!' Terrible, but true.
False. I think that a lot.
71. If we love you, and youre hurt on the basketball court, rolling on the floor in pain; we’re hurting more just watching you.
Maybe not more, but i wouldn't know.
72. We LOVE it when you get nervous around us. It's adorable! Don't think you have to be Mr. Cool Guy all the time.
Maybe.
73. Don't play hard to get. We’ll get bored and move on.
Not necessarily. Some of us are kind of pathetic. But yeah, that's a dumb way to play.
74. If you don't call us, then we will spend hours thinking about why you never called, and we will waste a lot of time thinking about it, eventually coming to the conclusion that we don't like you anymore.
True, mostly.
75. We lost interest quickly if you lead us on but never take action.
Eventually.
76. We might seem to flirt a lot, but a girl always thinks about the one guy she really likes right before she falls asleep.
I don't know that that applies to every girl, but... seems accurate.
77. When a girl likes a guy, she subconsciously gives him a song that makes her think of him every time she hears it.
Ha. Often.
78. If guys do the same as girls do in #77, tell her what song reminds you of her.
Good idea.
79. Randomly compliment girls in conversations. If you're talking about sports, be like "Oh, by the way, that shirt really made your eyes look green today." It totally throws us off, and we love it.
Unless we're talking about, like, fat people... That might be almost offensively confusing... Or just hilarious. Feel free to try it, actually.
80. Ask us about how we're doing once in a while, and at least pretend to be interested.
No, pretending is bad. Care.
81. If we're not talking to you, we secretly want you to talk to us first.
Unless we don't like you.
82. Play with our hair without being like a gay hairstylist.
I happen to think my boyfriend acting like a gay hairstylist would be awesome.
83. We get really happy when you show any sign of interest. Don't just do it and then never do it again. Bad bad bad…
... ?
84. Keep up the conversation on IM and phones and in person! Don't be awkward. That’s bad.
HEY. Lay off awkward people. I understand completely.
85. We will always feel bad if we don't like you back. Not all girls are b!tches, no matter what you may think. We hate to reject you.
No, not everyone always.
86. ok, so some girls are b!tches and they like rejecting boys, but the people who wrote this group are not. better?
Yes, much better.
87. If we say "Let's just be friends", we really mean it. Don't keep trying to pursue us, and don't say ok and then ignore us. That's just mean and horrible.
Unless we don't mean it and are trying dishonestly to be nice. But don't assume that's the case! If i'm the one saying it, i really do want to still be friends.
88. It's adorable when a best guy friend who a girl has thought about liking confesses he likes her.
Usually... It could go badly, of course. But so could anything.
89. If you’re single, find the one girl who’s always there on the sidelines at your football game, or at each of your concerts, all your baseball games. She loves you. Her excuse may be that she’s there for her brother, but she’s really there for you.
HA! Possible hugely bad idea assumption. XD (But it could be true, i guess.)
90. After you find that girl, smile at her once in a while, it’ll mean the world to her.
Unless she really is just there for her brother. Or your teammate. Or another guy in your band...
91. Get to know her, you’ll make her year first of all, and maybe, just maybe, you’ll end up liking her.
That probably can't hurt.
92. Not all blondes are b!tches. Some are cool.
No, we're all horrible. Seriously, if you make judgments like that based on hair color, you're an idiot.
93. Not all blondes are sluts. Some have morals.
See above.
94. In your mind, give every girl a chance. Each one deserves at least one.
Every person, really.
95. Girls fantasize too, its just not always about sex.
Um, right.
96. We girls give you guys code names so that you don’t know that we’re talking about you. :]
Sometimes. Ha, Pop-Tart. And whatever the rest of them were... :D
97. If you’re jealous, it may suck for you, but we think it’s attractive if you really care that much. Unless you're controlling or an asshole about it.
98. If a girl blushes when you talk to her, she either likes you or she's embarrassed by what you're saying.
I guess so.
99. Girls don’t really write your name on a piece of paper a million times if they like you, that’s a myth…… sometimes
Yeah, most of the time after elementary school it's a myth.
100. If a girl really likes you, just seeing you will make her day.
Sometimes.
101. Even if you aren’t all that cute, and we like you, we think you’re hot. Don’t take advantage of that, take pride in that.
Exactly. :) Except how would you take advantage of that?
102. Every time you smile at us, it may mean only a little to you, but it means the world to us. Don't take the little things for granted.
Not always true, but decent advice.
So, there... I'm done... yeah... That was pretty lame and "yeah," but oh, well. Somebody will learn from it, probably.
So... I found one of these things on Facebook, and i wanted to post it with my thoughts on each one like Violet did once. Because i have thoughts on some of them, and posting them all together for the few people who either want to hear it or are dumb to read my blog when they don't is better than annoying everyone in the world, right?
So, here... This might be really long.
1. Do not cheat on a girl. We girls talk, we WILL know, and we WILL find out, and we WILL dump you!
Okay, not cheating is a pretty good place to start with the relationship advice. If the fact that the other peson would find out and dump you is the only reason you don't, though, i think you've got a problem.
2. Be aware of all your girlfriends’ guy friends, brothers, fathers, or anything. They are protective. Every single male friend we have will kick your ass if you end up hurting her.
False... Only some very lucky girls have so many good other male figures in their lives. But be safe and go ahead and assume we all do. Can't hurt to avoid hurting her.
3. Never ever miss an opportunity to tell her that she’s beautiful. We girls love that.
But don't not mean it or get annoying.
4. If she slapped you hard, you probably deserved it.
Yeah, pretty much, probably.
5. Do not be afraid of holding her. If she’s going out with you in the first place, it’s obvious that she likes you and wants to be in your arms.
Except some weird ones, but this works for me. Just, again, don't get annoying.
6. Every girl should eventually get three things from her boyfriend -- a stuffed animal, one of his sweatshirts or hoodie’s, and a really pretty piece of jewelry.
Sure. Those are all nice.
7. Make sure she gets home safely as often as you can. If you're dropping her off, walk her to the door. If you aren't dropping her off, call to be sure she's home safely. We think that’s really cute and sweet.
Agreed.
8. If a guy is bothering your girlfriend, it is your right to beat the sh!t out of him.
Not really... and she might not appreciate having to leave because you got kicked out of wherever... and she might not like violence...
9. If you're talking to a female friend of yours, pull your girlfriend closer. It’ll make her feel secure that you love her more than the other girl.
Agreed.
10. Never ever slap her, even if it's just in a joking way. Even if she swats you first, and says, "Oh, you're so dumb" or something, never make any gestures back.
Agreed.
11. Go along with her to a chick flick once in a while. She doesn't care whether you enjoy it or not, it just matters that you went with her.
In that she'll appreciate your being willing to do something only she enjoys with her, yeah, that's pretty nice.
12. If you're officially dating, and you're introducing her to your friends, you'd better damn well introduce her as your girlfriend. Or else.
YES. Well, duh.
13. Girls are fragile. Even if you're play fighting/wrestling, be very gentle. Let her win once in a while.
Yeah. Duh... Why not let her win all the time?
14. Memorize your girlfriend’s birthday. You forget her birthday and you're basically screwed for life. Not gonna lie.
I don't know if it's quite that important, but that's a pretty easy thing to go ahead and remember, and she might be a little offended if you forget.
15. Don't drench yourself in the cologne, but smell good.
Advice applicable in almost any situation...
16. You don’t have to spend a million dollars on the Birthday/Christmas/Valentine gift. It doesn't have to be expensive, or cost anything but it has to be meaningful.
Okay.
17. Don’t ever lie to us; we always find out.
AGREED. Even if we don't find out...
18. Don’t say you understand when you don’t. That’s bad.
That goes with lying.
19. Remember: Girls are pretty, but yours is the Prettiest!
If you don't know that already, you suck.
20. Saying something sweet might get you off the hook; but doing something sweet will always get you off the hook.
No. It won't. Don't expect to always get off the hook, but doing is better than saying.
21. Size does matter, but only to hoes; not girls that want relationships.
... Right.
22. No matter what you say, your ex-girlfriend is a hoe. Don’t bother trying to convince us otherwise, that is a bad idea.
No, THAT is a bad idea. Why do you want to come across as an asshole who will be trashing her if you break up? Be honest, you idiot. But don't still be into your ex.
23. It’s good to be sensitive, to a point.
Of course.
24. If you did something wrong, apologize. Even if you didn’t, do it anyway.
Agreed.
25. You did something bad. I seem cool with it. I'm not. (See directly above.)
Maybe...
26. We are self-conscious by nature; we can’t help it. Let it be.
No, don't, unless we ask you to or something. Don't you want us to get better?
27. We don’t shave our legs every day so just get over it.
Right. And neither do you, so don't be a hypocrite. :P
28. Shave your face, no matter how cool you think your goatee or beard or mustache looks, we probably hate it. We like you clean shaven.
That's a matter of personal taste, so ignore this advice and find out what she really thinks.
29. Show off a little, we think it’s cute.
A little. :D
30. You are our boyfriend, our man, our protector, whether you know it or not, you are; act like it.
Of course.
31. You are cute in raglan-sleeved T-shirts (two-toned baseball undershirts).
Maybe... (Yeah, generally, i think so. :D)
32. We love it when you hug us from behind and whisper in our ear.
Some of us do... Like me... But not everyone, so don't assume...
33. "Fine" is NEVER an appropriate response when I ask you how I look.
Well, that might sound like you're lying or not bothering to be honest... But if it's what you think, that's what you should say, i think.
34. Most of the time when I fantasize, it's about you. Don’t obsess over that.
Um... right ...
35. I expect you to call me. If you don’t, you go down.
? Maybe...
36. I'm more forgiving of you than I really should be. Don’t you dare take advantage of that.
...
37. When I compare my flabby tummy to a kangaroo pouch, say nothing.
...
38. You look hot in hooded clothing items. Always.
Not if you're also wearing a visible sparkly thong. But hoodies are great and stuff, sure.
39. You should never tell a girl what to do. Ever.
Well, not usually.
40. Any decent man will ask a girl out to her face. I mean; if you aren’t man enough to ask us out to our face, who says youre gonna be man enough to our boyfriend at all.
Hah... Generally.
41. Girls are very impressed when you ask them for advice. Unless its about another girl.
No, even then. Unless you're asking your girlfriend for advice about cheating on her...
42. I'm unimpressed with a man who doesn't take the lead.
Good for you.
Yes, the guy should generally lead.
43. When in doubt, go with the shirt that matches your eye color.
Good plan. Except when none of the ones you're considering do match, but...
44. You're sexy when you're shaving, fixing things, wearing a white T-shirt and jeans, driving, eating a peach, holding a baby.
Yeah... pretty much. :)
45. Girls need to hear how you feel about them. Often. Tell her now.
Generally.
46. A girl wants to be the best thing that ever happened to you--and for you to recognize this and tell her.
If she wants to be your girlfriend, probably. Otherwise, maybe not.
47. If she’s not feeling loved, she will start looking....
A lot of girls will... Others might just get upset and stuff...
48. We like it when you tell us what you're thinking, even if you don't know yourself. It’s cute.
Mostly.
49. It's cheating as soon as you're doing something with her that you wouldn't want me to see, hear, read...
Agreed.
50. For the record: I'd rather you break up with me than cheat.
Um, same here. I think.
51. We can fall in love with you without really knowing you, if you are an @ss, we will find out, and we will get over it. Fast. Don't ruin it.
Maybe. Not ruining it is a good idea.
52. You like her, make a move. Don’t just sit there, you will fail, and you won’t get her.
Oookay.
53. Baseball players are hot. The sport makes you skinny and your arm muscles… well, it’s hot. We’ll go to all your games even if we hate baseball.
Pretty much... But yeah, guys really need to know that.
54. When you compliment us, we aren't sure how to accept the compliment without leading you on or reject the compliment without hurting you. So just bear with us here.
Uh... it's not like that for me. I'm just awkward, period.
55. WE HATE BEING LED ON! If you think it's bad being led on by a girl, try being led on by a guy.
Do guys even do that?
56. We like it when guys are willing to have an actual relationship, not just a one-night stand. Most girls don't like pimps or players, just guys who like ONE girl only.
No way! Really?!?
57. But don't be obssessive. Major turn-off.
No-brainer also.
58. Call sometimes, just to say hi, not for a certain reason. When we see your number on caller ID, our heart always skips a beat. Try calling just to say good night, or good morning, its soo adorable!
If we REALLY like you... If we don't, it might become annoying.
59. BE HONEST!
No duh. Very important.
60. Don't ONLY tell us what we want to hear. We HATE that.
That's part of being honest.
61. At sleepovers, if you wonder what we talk about, quit worrying. It really is only you.
LIAR. Hahaha... We talk about tons of things other than you. Many of which you probably don't want to know about.
62. If you catch us staring, it is most likely because we're spacing out, not because we really stare at you. Unless we smile when you notice. Then you either look really hot, or we like you.
Probably true... I space out a lot...
63. We like it when you hold us when we're crying. It's good to feel loved and safe.
YES.
64. Don't go to our friends to talk about us. Come straight to us.
Duh.
65. Don't tell us you love us unless you are positive you mean it. If we don't say it back, it's just that we really want to mean it when we say it. Don't say it right away, then it shows lack of commitment.
Of course... Are guys really this dumb?
66. We like our hands to be held and our waists to be touched.
A lot of times... not always.
67. We like you to kiss our hand and cheeks and forehead (esp. forehead!!), not just shove your tongue down our throats. We do like to breathe.
Because who would have known we like breathing and not being... Kiss-raped?
68. We like it when you're tender, but don't lose your masculinity.
Yeah, don't cry watching Extreme Makeover: Home Edition... Actually, just don't watch it at all. That show sucks.
69. Do chivalrous things when we least expect it (ex. holding doors for us).
And when we do expect it. That's even more important.
70. As surprising as it may be, while guys might actually look at personality, the first thing girls look at tends to be looks. We're not going to see you and think, 'I wonder what his personality is like!' Terrible, but true.
False. I think that a lot.
71. If we love you, and youre hurt on the basketball court, rolling on the floor in pain; we’re hurting more just watching you.
Maybe not more, but i wouldn't know.
72. We LOVE it when you get nervous around us. It's adorable! Don't think you have to be Mr. Cool Guy all the time.
Maybe.
73. Don't play hard to get. We’ll get bored and move on.
Not necessarily. Some of us are kind of pathetic. But yeah, that's a dumb way to play.
74. If you don't call us, then we will spend hours thinking about why you never called, and we will waste a lot of time thinking about it, eventually coming to the conclusion that we don't like you anymore.
True, mostly.
75. We lost interest quickly if you lead us on but never take action.
Eventually.
76. We might seem to flirt a lot, but a girl always thinks about the one guy she really likes right before she falls asleep.
I don't know that that applies to every girl, but... seems accurate.
77. When a girl likes a guy, she subconsciously gives him a song that makes her think of him every time she hears it.
Ha. Often.
78. If guys do the same as girls do in #77, tell her what song reminds you of her.
Good idea.
79. Randomly compliment girls in conversations. If you're talking about sports, be like "Oh, by the way, that shirt really made your eyes look green today." It totally throws us off, and we love it.
Unless we're talking about, like, fat people... That might be almost offensively confusing... Or just hilarious. Feel free to try it, actually.
80. Ask us about how we're doing once in a while, and at least pretend to be interested.
No, pretending is bad. Care.
81. If we're not talking to you, we secretly want you to talk to us first.
Unless we don't like you.
82. Play with our hair without being like a gay hairstylist.
I happen to think my boyfriend acting like a gay hairstylist would be awesome.
83. We get really happy when you show any sign of interest. Don't just do it and then never do it again. Bad bad bad…
... ?
84. Keep up the conversation on IM and phones and in person! Don't be awkward. That’s bad.
HEY. Lay off awkward people. I understand completely.
85. We will always feel bad if we don't like you back. Not all girls are b!tches, no matter what you may think. We hate to reject you.
No, not everyone always.
86. ok, so some girls are b!tches and they like rejecting boys, but the people who wrote this group are not. better?
Yes, much better.
87. If we say "Let's just be friends", we really mean it. Don't keep trying to pursue us, and don't say ok and then ignore us. That's just mean and horrible.
Unless we don't mean it and are trying dishonestly to be nice. But don't assume that's the case! If i'm the one saying it, i really do want to still be friends.
88. It's adorable when a best guy friend who a girl has thought about liking confesses he likes her.
Usually... It could go badly, of course. But so could anything.
89. If you’re single, find the one girl who’s always there on the sidelines at your football game, or at each of your concerts, all your baseball games. She loves you. Her excuse may be that she’s there for her brother, but she’s really there for you.
HA! Possible hugely bad idea assumption. XD (But it could be true, i guess.)
90. After you find that girl, smile at her once in a while, it’ll mean the world to her.
Unless she really is just there for her brother. Or your teammate. Or another guy in your band...
91. Get to know her, you’ll make her year first of all, and maybe, just maybe, you’ll end up liking her.
That probably can't hurt.
92. Not all blondes are b!tches. Some are cool.
No, we're all horrible. Seriously, if you make judgments like that based on hair color, you're an idiot.
93. Not all blondes are sluts. Some have morals.
See above.
94. In your mind, give every girl a chance. Each one deserves at least one.
Every person, really.
95. Girls fantasize too, its just not always about sex.
Um, right.
96. We girls give you guys code names so that you don’t know that we’re talking about you. :]
Sometimes. Ha, Pop-Tart. And whatever the rest of them were... :D
97. If you’re jealous, it may suck for you, but we think it’s attractive if you really care that much. Unless you're controlling or an asshole about it.
98. If a girl blushes when you talk to her, she either likes you or she's embarrassed by what you're saying.
I guess so.
99. Girls don’t really write your name on a piece of paper a million times if they like you, that’s a myth…… sometimes
Yeah, most of the time after elementary school it's a myth.
100. If a girl really likes you, just seeing you will make her day.
Sometimes.
101. Even if you aren’t all that cute, and we like you, we think you’re hot. Don’t take advantage of that, take pride in that.
Exactly. :) Except how would you take advantage of that?
102. Every time you smile at us, it may mean only a little to you, but it means the world to us. Don't take the little things for granted.
Not always true, but decent advice.
So, there... I'm done... yeah... That was pretty lame and "yeah," but oh, well. Somebody will learn from it, probably.
Sunday, January 3, 2010
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